Back from vacation....Had a great time will post some pictures later once I get everything back in order at home lol Thanks to all that left comments while I was gone and soooo sorry to Lucy I forgot to send my foot picture before we left :(

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing
and
decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the
wife
decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance,
and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside
the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, Isn't that
obvious?")

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you
could start at any moment. "I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,"
says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true but you have all the equipment. For all I know
you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.

> > > MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she
can also think.

Two South Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day Jim goes down to the college and meets the dean of admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: math, English, history, and logic.
"Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"
The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weedeater?"
"Yeah," replies Jim.
"Then logically, because you own a weedeater, I think that you would have a yard."
"That's true, I do have a yard."
"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house."
"Yes, I do have a house."
"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family."
"I have a family."
"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife."

"Yes, I do have a wife."
"And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a heterosexual."
"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weedeater."
Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for math, English, history, and logic.
"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"
Jim says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weedeater?"
"No."
"Then you're a queer."

Life's like a road that you travel on
When there's one day here and the next day gone
Sometimes you bend and sometimes you stand
Sometimes you turn your back to the wind
There's a world outside ev'ry darkened door
Where blues won't haunt you anymore
Where brave are free and lovers soar
Come ride with me to the distant shore
We won't hesitate
To Break down the garden gate
There's not much time left today

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long

Through all these cities and all these towns
It's in my blood and it's all around
I love you now like I loved you then
This is the road and these are the hands
From Mozambique to those Memphis nights
The khyber Pass to Vancouver's lights

Knock me down get back up again
You're in my blood
I'm not a lonely man
There's no load I can't hold
Road so rough this I know
I'll be there when the light comes in
Just tell 'em we're survivors

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If your going my way
I wanna drive it all night long

Gimme gimme gimme gimme yeah

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long

There was a distance between you and I
A misunderstanding once
But now we look it in the eye

There ain't no load that I can't hold
Road so rough this I know
I'll be there when the light comes in
Just tell 'em we're survivors

Life is a highway
I wanna ride it all night long
If you're going my way
I wanna drive it all night long